I need a Hobby

I need a hobby. I have lots of things to do but no hobby that is just my own. Here is the run down of things that I do. Children's Ministry Wednesday Nights Sunday School Teacher Sound Board operator for Church Gym (M, Th, Sat) But these are things I have to leave my house for to go and do! I want something I can do at home that leaves me fulfilled and feeling crafty. I once thought sewing or knitting would be something for me. But I have yet to learn and this would be something else I would have to leave the house for to go and learn. When I have kids I want to be the crafty fun mom. I want to be able to make things for my children that they will appreciate and think is the greatest thing since sliced bread. Right now I can only cook and for the first few years this skill won't even be something they can wow over because they won't be old enough to enjoy it.

Why I like Tuesdays!

Tuesday is the most misunderstood day of the week. Most people hate Tuesday because it follows Monday, isn't Hump-Day (Wednesday), Thursday (only one more day), or Friday (Yay TGIF). Poor little Tuesday must gets its feelings hurt because people have even made up songs about how crappy Tuesday is.

Well I am here to tell you I LOVE TUESDAY! Tuesday is my only day of the week that I get to go home to do whatever I like because I don't have an activity on Tuesday. I secretly (until now) anticipate Tuesday because I know if I am tired I can go home and take a nap, if I forgot to exercise on Monday, I can exercise at my leisure, or if i want to cook something fun for dinner, I will have time to do this. Tuesday has limitless possibilities. It holds a special place in my heart.

I HEART TUESDAY

I am like Alexander!

I am like Alexander and his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Or at least I was yesterday. This was one of my favorite stories as a child and it applies today.

Yesterday I was tired all day because I could sleep the night before. So I slightly over slept and didn't have time to wash my hair, so I had to wear it in a pony tail...which i think makes my head look really really really small. My outfit made me feel like a guy...and I knew I would be like Alexander.

The day didn't get better because no matter what I touched it broke, got knocked over, or could have killed someone (okay a slight exaggeration) all of which made me hate the day more.

It seems we all go through days like this and it always seems that the days we have to endure this struggle are our most busiest day. Wednesdays are my busy days because of work and church activities. I got to church and I need to personally thank those lovely friends that made me realize that my day wasn't so bad; I was loved, appreciated, respected, and needed.

At least for me, I made my Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day worse by dwelling on it. I made those things happen because I was expecting them to keep happening. However, when I stopped and realized I could accomplish goals and have fun, things seemed to turn around. Now I will just have to remember this the next time a day like that appears.

May we all have Wonderful, Awesome, No Bad, Very Good Days!

Am I Weird?

I think I might be the weirdest person ever. I say weird things, and don't know when to quit. I hope this quality is something that my friends find endearing and not annoying.

One of my best friends always tell me I am hilarious, and I make her laugh. I think this is a good thing. I have an aunt that always said she would rather spend her life laughing over crying. So maybe this is my job...to make people laugh. I laugh at myself quite regularly over the words I say (because lets face it I sometimes talk so fast that not all the words come out and my meanings get lost in the shuffle).

Two things I can do...1) I could slow down and allow my thoughts to come regularly. I have tried this but then I sound like I am trying to hard or monotone. 2) Be quieter and not participate in so much conversation. To this I say, "where is the fun in that?"

So I guess my lot in life is the be the funny girl who makes people laugh, and since lots of doctors think laughter is medicine, does that me I cure people? Too bad though that my funniness only occurs in oral conversation and when I try to write it down it becomes cheesy. If cheesy sells though maybe I should write my experiences down.

My Struggle

My struggle my whole life has been my weight. I would probably be shocked to know that there might be people out there that wish they looked like me but I wish I could look in the mirror and not see a fat girl. I do not know my weight, I refuse to know the number. I don't even look when I get on the scale at the doctors office; I shut my eyes. My doctor chuckles, and only ever tells me that I am healthy as a horse. Could she have used another animal please, a skinny one?

I was a fat kid when I was in grade school, which has led to this adult obsession with my weight and how I look in the mirror and in my clothes. I think my husband has given up on trying to convince me otherwise, he just tells me every day that he thinks I am beautiful and wouldn't change a thing about me. (I often think he is deranged)!

I don't want to look like a super model, I just want clothes to fit me right and to walk in a store and have most of the clothes I try on fit the way they are supposed to. I am hippy, and short wasted, with skinny legs (my good feature) and a big chest (good and bad feature). I have to buy shirts that fit in the chest but are like tents every where else. Cute bra/underwear sets, they don't have those in my size ( or as a Victoria Secret sales girl once said we don't have anything here for you, have you tried our catalog?) Am I forced to catalog shop because I am a weird shaped/sized person who can't fit into normal clothes in the department store?

It isn't like I don't exercise. I am pretty good about trying to exercise for at least an hour a day 3 to 4 times a week. I think that is pretty good. Although I should probably do this everyday, it isn't like the days I don't spend my hour doing an exercise routine that I am eating bonbons by the gallons and watching hours and hours of tv. I do other things.

I don't eat too many bad for me things. I try really really hard not to buy bad things at the store and bring them into the house. If I want something I don't deprive myself but do things in moderation which is what all the books, articles, workout people, etc are telling us to do. I get up every morning and do some sort of crunches, push ups, or sit ups to get the blood going to start my day, and still I hate my body.

My church has recently started a Made to Crave bible study by author Lysa Trekeurst. It focuses on Craving God not food. It is supposed to go along with whatever diet and exercise plan you have decided works bests for you. Now I cannot attend the bible study itself because I teach a different class on the night they meet, but the lovely ladies of the class have let me join their online fb group while I do the study at home.

I hope and pray that this is the missing link. That this will teach me to appreciate my body because God doesn't make mistakes. We are all wonderfully and beautifully made by Him. I know he loves me, but hates that I have placed food and the pleasure from food above him. I have so far read the introduction and first chapter and completed the first personal bible study. I find it interesting that the author compared our food struggle with the first struggle of sin. Eve was tempted by food (the fruit from the forbidden tree). She was not starving for God had provided her with everything she would need for nutrition, yet she desired the one thing that she was not supposed to have. I think it is time to deny my french fries, my second portions, and my just one more mentality (these are my crosses) and follow my God and Savior with all I have. Or at the very least begin my journey to accomplish this.

I will keep you posted as to what I learn!