Psalm 1

Psalm 1:

 ¹ Blessed is the one
   who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
   or sit in the company of mockers,
² but whose delight is in the law of the LORD,
   and who meditates on his law day and night.
³ That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
   which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
   whatever they do prospers.

 ⁴ Not so the wicked!
   They are like chaff
   that the wind blows away.
⁵ Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
   nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
 ⁶ For the LORD watches over the way of the righteous,
   but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.

It has been on my heart for some time to read a Psalm a day.  I don't know why this is so, but even in preparing lesson's for my 2yr. old class, I find myself coming back to the Psalms.  My heart is hurting and has been for several weeks now.  I need to figure out the hurt and be able to express it.

My birthday was last Tuesday, yup I am 29! The weird part is I was not excited about this birthday as I have about all other birthdays.  Normally, I can't sleep the night before with anticipation of my big day; even as an adult I get excited.  This year I was not excited when I woke that day, I wasn't excited when my dear husband wished me well, and was not me on that day.  I didn't really want people to know that it was my birthday.  The hardest part was opening the card my mom sent.  I thoroughly appreciated the card and the gift, but the card was just from her.  It didn't say love mom and dad, it just said, love mom.  Love mom means the world to me, don't get me wrong, I love my mom and am glad she is my mother. But my dad always picked out my cards.  He took his time and always seemed to pick out the right one for that year.  I cried when I opened it because he was missing.  I think that is why I wasn't excited, he was missing, so how could I be excited?

My husband out did himself in the gift he gave, a weekend to be pampered and told that I was loved.  And nothing could take away the wonderful time I had at Starr Pass with him. But I would have traded all that pleasure and enjoyment for one more day with my dad.  And that makes me feel awful and wicked, that  I would trade the wonderful time with my husband, the man God gave to me, because He knew I would need him. 

My prayer today as I read the above Psalm...Lord lead me to the path of the righteous and keep me from my wicked thoughts.  Help me delight in the memories and look forward to the future you have in store. Lord, please watch over me because I will fail on my own. Keep me from my gossiping ways and help me to be strong in your law, which is truth and right!